Thank you mom

I wanted to write a thank you card to my mother for all that she has done for Gary, Bryce and I over the last month + but I felt like a thank you card just wasn't enough.  How do you really show your gratitude to someone who has done so much for you?  It isn't easy.  Gifts? Thank yous?  It just doesn't seem like enough.  I decided that sharing my appreciation with the world would be the best next thing I could think of.

My mom has been here since October 25.  She came for our baby shower and always planned on staying until Christmas to help us with the new baby.  On November 17th we had Bryce and she was now a grandma.  She has been staying with us ever since and has done laundry, cleaned the house, did the dishes daily (our dishwasher had broke!), ran errands with me, helped out with Bryce daily and so much more!

Through the ups and downs of being a new mom she has been here.  She has been ever so helpful and reassuring through the entire 5 weeks of Bryce's life!  I can't imagine what life would have been like without her here.  Although I was a nanny for many years, being a mom is different.  It is a lot more.  Being a nanny has structure and plans.  Being a mom has unpredictability in the beginning stages.  Don't get me wrong, nannying did too, but in a different way.  I love that my mom was here to experience it all with me and the family.  We had days of laughter and days where we cried.  (I mostly cried... silly hormones!)  It was funny when I would cry.  I wasn't sure why I was crying but there I was.  My favorite memory was when I was trying to pump and feed at the same time (in the first week or two) and the milk spilled everywhere.  I started crying.  Then I said, "I can't believe I am crying over spilled milk."  We laughed and laughed.

The Fuhrmans have had quite a 2013 and my mom has been here through it all.  She has taken time out of her life to come be a part of ours so selflessly!  She is the best and I am forever grateful for her.

Mom, I know that not everything has been easy since dad passed away, but you have been so strong.  You could have taken so many paths in your life but you chose a good one.  I love how caring and thoughtful you are and how you are always there for us.  I know it makes you sad that dad can't be here to meet his grandson, but I know that he is smiling down on you because you have taken such good care of everyone.  I'm sure he just loves seeing all that we do and he is proud to have such a great wife, 2 daughters, a son, 2 son-in-laws and now a wonderful grandson.  He may never get to meet him in life but we will make sure to keep dad's spirit alive so that all his grand kids know who he was.

Thank you for all that you do and all that you are!  You are amazing and Bryce is so lucky to have you as a grandma!  We will miss you so much!  Love you to the moon and back!

xoxo

Jamie, Gary & Bryce

Choose your path

Sometimes I get in the mood to blog and then I decide I am just too busy to consume myself in writing right now.  I'm sure you all feel this way about something or another.  It seems like no matter how many hours are in the day, nothing seems to get accomplished.  There is simply just too much to do!

I am trying to get better about managing my day but it is still a work in progress.  Sometimes I just want to relax and enjoy a cup of coffee in the morning.  What should only be about 20 minutes of relaxation sometimes turns into an hour.  Well, that hour could have been dedicated to working out or cleaning the bathroom or organizing the garage.  Sometimes time just slips away from me.

When you think about the time you waste deciding what it is you want to accomplish for the day you realize that there is so much more time that you could have had to get something accomplished.  I am notorious for doing this.  I plan and plan and plan.  I make lists.  I have agendas.  My calendar is packed full of things to do yet why don't I get more things done!?

I think part of my problem is is that I put too much on my plate and don't give myself time to breathe.  Also, I tend to get bored easy.  I think I have started about 30 different projects this summer and haven't completed much of them.  We are two days away from the autumnal equinox and I can't seem to comprehend where the summer went to.  I know I have done a ton of things and have been super busy but I feel like I have nothing to show for it.

I know I am an organized person and if I set a deadline for myself, I get things done.  I have no problem with time management if there is a deadline.  If I just let things happen, well, then, I drive my fiance crazy!  I tend to want to do so many things.  My mind is creative and it is always thinking of something new.  I can't help it.  I love to reorganize and reorganize again.  It is fun.

Which leads to me to this:  Why am I doing things I don't think are fun or that I love?  Well, there you go.  You need to do the things you love but sometimes you have to do things you don't love to do too.  Maybe if I start doing the things I don't love first, I can get them out of the way and can then start to enjoy completing my 30 projects.

So here is to trying a new approach to the not so fun things I have to do in my life so that I get to enjoy the things I love!

A bit of a blunder type of week....

My week has been an interesting one.  It hasn't been necessarily bad, but it has been a little bit off.  Monday I got up super early to start work from home at 7AM.  The day wasn't so bad.  I had a doctor's appointment and then volleyball that night.  I also started training for a half marathon so I was keeping busy!  On top of all that I managed to stub my toe and bleed like crazy all while trying to go and get sunflower seeds during Gary's softball game.  Maybe that should have been my sign, but of course I didn't listen.

The next day I had brought my computer to work because I had had an interested buyer for it.  Well, I was trying to restore it to the factory settings and wasn't doing it right.  Gary offered to help me that night but I had already started to get upset over nothing!  I ended up canceling my happy hour and rushing home to get my stuff together to head to Gary's so he could fix everything.  During the "fixing" of the computer I had a mini breakdown about what, I do not know.   I finally started to calm down a bit and went home with a sigh of relief that I was able to get the computer to where it needed to be.  Then I of course needed to do my run for the night.  It made me feel so much better!

Wednesday was another adventure in the making.  I seemed to be having a great day.  I felt good, my stomach didn't hurt and I was going rollerblading after work and then off to watch Gary play softball.  Well, I went rollerblading and then was getting ready to go and realized my wallet was missing!  ARGH!  I knew at that moment I had left it at work.  I ended up driving all the way back into the city running inside with the hopes that it would still be at my cube.  Lucky for me, it was.  Phew!  I ended up making the second softball game and enjoying a beer and then grocery shopping with Gary.

Yesterday I was hoping for a good day, but guess what I almost forgot to do before the government shutdown?  I almost forgot to get my fishing license!  I went online and tried to purchase but they said I was not a resident.  Excuse me!  I've lived in Minnesota for almost 5 years!  Needless to say after my rescheduled happy hour that I had to cancel on Tuesday, I headed to Walmart to get my fishing license.  45 minutes later I was still a non resident and paying $25 for a three day pass.  Of course I'll be fighting that later once the government gets their heads out of their tush and fires up the government once again.  Thank goodness I was going for a run after that.  Yet wait, it gets better.  Here I am running my fast pace and rushing through the park.  I see a projector and a screen and look to my right and see lots of people watching a movie on the grass.  Yet, there I went right between the projector and the screen.  Sorry movie watchers!

My night ended well with a quick visit to the neighbors and hanging out with my roommate and Gary while doing lots of laundry in anticipation of my lake trip this weekend.  I'm pretty sure this weekend will make up for the weird week that just happened.

Happy fourth people!  Enjoy and be safe!!!
 

At a loss

I've set a deadline for myself to get out there and do what I love with my job.  Sadly though, the world of education/sports and kids really doesn't seem to be fishing for me.  I don't understand why it is so difficult.  I've got skills.  I went to school and received two undergrad degrees.  (Elementary Education and Broadcasting Communications)  I also went and got a MBA in project management.  On top of all that I worked as a nanny for 5 years, babysat for 15 years, worked in a daycare/preschool for 6 months, worked as an assistant teacher for 2 years and am working for an University.  Yet, that all doesn't seem to matter. 

First, you must have experience.  No wait, you must have recent experience.  Then you must have the degree to back up the experience.  No, no, just kidding, you can just have experience in some cases.  Also, you need to have a license!  Yep, you need a license for everything these days.  In order to get your license, you need more school and tests!  Yes, tests.  The thing that is supposed to define whether or not you are smart.  Guess what, I am not a test taker.  I can write a paper like no other but I don't take tests. 

On top of all this, there are teacher cuts, minimal jobs, and everyone is fighting to get the same position.  Now what?  I've gone to school to do what I love and yet here I am.  Don't get me wrong, I love my place of work, I just want to teach!  I don't understand why it is so hard. 

I've always wanted to stand out in this world, make a difference, help the kids of our future, but that dream seems to be slowly slipping through my fingers.  I don't want to give up the hard fight, but I also don't want to feel like a failure.  It isn't easy. 

Maybe someday, somehow, some way.  If I had it my way, I would be teaching across the country, working in sports and shaping our future generations for years to come.  Maybe my way will come someday.

Day 30- "My hero can also be my friend"

This next friend was a pretty amazing person in my eyes.  Growing up I wanted to be just like this friend.  He would watch body building competitions and go to the gym, so I wanted to grow up and be a body builder.  He ran for miles, so I wanted to run.  He coached, so I wanted to coach.  He taught, so I wanted to teach.  Anything he did, I pretty much wanted to do.  He was just so great at everything!  I followed him everywhere!  I personally enjoyed it when I was invited to go running with him.  I remember when I was 3 he let me run an entire mile with him!  I was so happy!  I remember getting back from that run and my mom had made muffins for us!  I was very happy. 

As I got older I grew closer to my mom but still was fond of this friend.  I looked up to him every day and thought he was just the most amazing person in all the world.  I told him that one day I was going to write a book about him and he told me not to bother because there was nothing worth writing about.  Yet, I valued that humbleness about him.  He never became snobby or a know it all about things.  Everyone looked up to him and valued what he did and what he taught.  He was mentor for many and a shoulder to lean on for many more. 

When I went away to the east coast for school and work, we communicated less and less but still had great laughs when we did talk.  I miss his laugh.  He left too soon from this world.  It is bittersweet. 

Not only is he my hero, but he is a hero to many.  As one former wrestler put it, " He didn't have to create a legacy… he was one." 

He was one of my best friends and I miss him every day!  Here's to you Dad!  (Ron Fuhrman)